100 Of The Best Curses and Insults In Italian: A Toolkit for the Testy Tourist

100 Of The Best Curses and Insults In Italian: A Toolkit for the Testy Tourist
Chuck Gonzales

Kirsten Hall

For When You Need Just the Right WordTravelling is fantastic – we don't deny it. But sometimes when you're in another country, stuff happens. A thieving kid lifts your wallet, a cab driver nearly kills you, or a waiter charges you $25 for bottled water. You feel powerless without the ability to do what you really want to do – curse them out.And what's the use of knowing the right curse if you can't pronounce it correctly? The only thing you'll succeed in doing is looking like some lame tourist. But you don't have to look like an idiot anymore. Here are 100 of the best curses and insults in Italian.So the next time a texting teen in Rome knocks over your gelato or a snickering Prada saleswoman in Milan insults your waistline, you'll know precisely how to say, Vaffanculo!

CONTENTS

Cover (#u3e74a658-19df-5856-8f0b-1821ecd0846c)

Title Page (#ud343edad-48cb-5aed-a782-cf5db57f5808)

Learn How To Give ’Em Hell Like A Native! (#ulink_e90428d6-32f6-5128-a8d4-2fafef9313e2)

Pronouncing Italian (#ulink_370531b1-2305-59ae-b28e-aba36e07eb8e)

Situation #1: Off the Hook (#ulink_802e6447-41b4-5c09-81df-3e9cd05a3366)

Situation #2: Like A Virgin (#ulink_62720a85-ccfd-56dd-b765-6619ad2b7208)

Situation #3: Fendi Fake-Out (#ulink_7bb07628-bb6e-5a03-a507-6c95229956ba)

Situation #4: Buy, Buy Baby (#ulink_179e6222-90ef-5fc3-bba8-bbb5c3dedbe3)

Situation #5: Waiter Hater (#ulink_505af7b4-298d-59a3-9616-43508a043f0d)

Situation #6: Oh, Man! (#ulink_d2f36e3b-da3a-5633-8b93-8eea3fc66000)

Situation #7: Mamma Mia (#ulink_b361cef4-e317-5357-b130-db2ed9ab0b6a)

Situation #8: Public Enemy #1 (#ulink_285b2d49-267c-5890-be60-8b731a13b510)

Situation #9: License To Drive (#ulink_7810384f-25a6-57c1-9f15-e8f3563e3bb3)

Situation #10: Get A Room! (#ulink_7d4de578-1475-5603-a087-eee21c18f860)

Situation #11: Striking Out (#ulink_7fd0087c-86e3-52a1-8f75-f409abdb9f54)

Situation #12: I Scream, You Scream (#ulink_b07874b4-18a3-5993-bcfe-56709d00b5fb)

Situation #13: Room Disservice (#ulink_1468c18c-b7cf-5092-aeb6-56a001fce730)

Situation #14: Out Of Order (#ulink_d332fe2c-dd75-568a-9c6b-77adeccdbd39)

Situation #15: Track Attack (#ulink_22762867-c3aa-59b4-9b0f-3d8af179ad50)

Situation #16: Missing the Boat (#ulink_6a859481-b13b-5b2d-860c-f52a3c71503c)

Situation #17: Hell, No! (#ulink_e8bab384-d7a2-51a3-8b0b-f9cb850add90)

Situation #18: Walk Of Shame (#ulink_1af64fc5-c4a6-5c98-bd06-11cb4c73c742)

Situation #19: The Prada Put-Down (#ulink_ba88a99d-de45-5ee4-8efa-239d97409f2f)

Situation #20: Mchatin’ It (#ulink_a99982fe-ab01-5d28-89b3-a6cb70c0d25c)

Situation #21: Foul Play (#ulink_bcc8841d-55d6-5205-ae7f-d72f21863fb8)

Situation #22: Tour De Farce (#ulink_cbe65ed5-c53b-5f29-9dc2-f6c4e7547a57)

Situation #23: All the Rage (#ulink_724f19d0-a8d8-5a32-95a5-8924c3bd43cc)

Situation #24: Going Wi-Fry (#ulink_82cff792-6a95-5101-9d18-26d7a4e6a772)

Situation #25: Cut the Fat (#ulink_16369e8a-2f0f-5228-b328-2863c356f3e2)

Situation #26: Sweet Revenge (#ulink_34b05ff9-343f-5e04-b631-73ec0263be96)

Situation #27: Driver’s Dread (#ulink_c0114647-2b95-55f5-b5f4-fc51352444fb)

Situation #28: Busted! (#ulink_8cfe12db-8aff-57fd-bc3e-bfab1a898d40)

Situation #29: Bull(Y)Sh**t! (#ulink_da504202-ce0d-5d50-ac3e-204fad80e40b)

Situation #30: Pity In Pink (#ulink_464132f2-7244-5f11-a076-ddbcc43a35eb)

Situation #31: Head’s Up! (#ulink_45af1185-7244-5a4a-87ed-0b3c08a77908)

Situation #32: Crossing the Line (#ulink_0dba1401-896a-5847-bdf1-1b53ed40cc47)

Situation #33: All Tapped Out (#ulink_ca54516c-08b5-51cb-8b6f-d5c4ab19e9af)

Situation #34: The Breaking Point (#ulink_8292491a-8371-558f-aedf-88b07df9a64c)

Situation #35: The Tip-Off (#ulink_44eea36a-5630-5d88-8de1-31e2ab6e62c3)

Situation #36: Dinner For One (#ulink_c0d5f0f3-cf6c-587c-8e7f-20c156585b00)

Situation #37: Down And Dirty (#ulink_6ce27792-ec14-53ba-93a3-7c4f540ed059)

Situation #38: Under the Tuscan Run (#ulink_d38bebd3-7f97-5110-9aac-2d4e1fdcd1c1)

Situation #39: Just Beat It! (#ulink_77d31f5f-ef8a-5220-a5b6-2e0058893700)

Situation #40: Taken For A Ride (#ulink_36951122-7b54-5872-963f-ee744d7c66ab)

Situation #41: Black And Blue (#ulink_f9d13023-40fd-58f4-a700-d29d971e13dc)

Situation #42: Space Invasion (#ulink_bdc7ea46-4724-5294-94c6-b02c3c304c04)

Situation #43: Bleat Street (#ulink_910dab55-4aba-5df3-be24-777bdbfe94e2)

Situation #44: Holy Crap! (#ulink_9c6d642d-c1db-5323-a1f5-a629adaf9426)

Situation #45: Urn Burn (#ulink_a4758297-f6f2-5bb9-ac17-cba26202aad5)

Copyright (#ulink_de48dcc9-dd9e-51da-a6a3-ac8c0c684191)

About the Publisher (#ulink_8dad94d7-2482-5fc1-a90f-c78bb5d4d32c)

LEARN HOW TO GIVE 'EM HELL LIKE A NATIVE! (#ulink_63538027-3a21-549c-bb32-9b0569eec280)

I must preface this book by saying: I heart Italy. I'd even go so far as to say it's my first true amore. I've traveled to many other remarkable places, but Italy and I, you see, we've had a love affair for almost 20 years. In fact, now that I think about it, my actual romance with Italy is pretty much gone, our relationship remaining profound but in a more platonic way. Sort of like the couple that has lived together so long that things like bad breath no longer matter. Italy and I, we're now old friends.

Once a year, I return to it, like an overused cell phone in need of a good charge. If I were to create my own romantic fresco depicting what I adore most about Italy, it would include the world's finest shoes, pasta, wine, art, gelato, architecture, and (I'm married now, so I'll include this last "element" with a nod to the past) men.

And though my fresco would not include the following, it's not to say they don't exist in Italy (and in fact, sometimes in abundance—especially in certain regions!): aggressive beggars, pickpockets, snobs, hotheads, mobsters, bullies, ingrates, slobs, liars, vultures, and perverts. Yes, they're there. Italy may very well be superior to the rest of the world in most ways, but is indeed just like the rest of us in others in that it is resplendent in its own vermin as well as beauty.

And so it is in response to the latter group, the people who might try to intercept your love affair with Italy, that I equip you with the following hundred-plus insults. Fight back. Be brave. And it's quite likely you'll discover Italy as your lover, too. Just as long as you don't forget, those are my sloppy seconds!